One dance, one look, one dance, can bring so many repressed, dormant feelings bubbling to the surface. In many country’s prostitutes charge more for kissing than they do for sex? Why? Because sex can be very perfunctory, while kissing serves no real purpose other than to convey very real emotion. Love, lust, passion, tenderness, care, adoration can all be expressed in a kiss, if it’s good enough, if the timing and chemistry are right.
It seems so simple, to open your mouth and let someone inhale your exhaled breath, to breathe them in, taste them, smell them, touch them in a way that doesn’t cause physical climax but satiates an even more vital urge: the desire to feel needed and loved. When’s the last time you’ve been properly kissed?
Here’s the thing about chemistry: You can fight it, vehemently, but you will always lose.The desire to be with someone can often be like a leaky faucet. Quite nagging, at first, especially if you’re trying to focus on something (or someone) else. But soon, it becomes like a tidal wave, crashing over you again and again, reminding you how numb you felt before this insistent, demanding, exhilarating, and even frightening experience. But giving in…Giving in can be like dancing outside during a thunderstorm: risky, exciting, fortifying. So what if you get a bit wet? It can feel so good to surrender…
Have you ever been willing to risk everything for someone who’s spirit was embedded in your heart and mind?
Polite disbelief radiated from him,
At the idea that I wasn’t as beautiful as he’d imagined.
“I’m ordinary”, I insisted.
But he would always see me as supernally beautiful.
Thus, I was incapable of loving him
In any way that wasn’t extraordinary.
Sometimes, a song captures you not necessarily with words or melody, but because of this inexplicable mixture of calm, adrenaline, nostalgia, and euphoria it evokes. This is such a song.
“There’s beauty in the breakdown.”
Letting go of the past can be difficult. Letting go of the present, of relevant, poignant, on-going pain, and allowing oneself to be removed from that which causes it, no matter the sacrifice, can be impossible. Humanity’s greatest asset and largest flaw lies in our ability to adapt. Unfortunately, being able to adapt and function in new circumstances always comes with a rough adjustment periods, which in tun leads to complacency with bad situations. Because most of us have ourselves fooled that our situations, no matter how unhappy they make us, are better and far more favourable that starting over would be. Pithy, trite sayings like “It could always be worse” or “Better the evil you know than the evil you don’t know”, help us to justify our own fear of change, which is very often tangentially linked to a fear of happiness.
The truth is, there is always room for growth, for change, and many of us will never reach our full potential or personal success or happiness because we are too afraid, and have become best frenemies with fear and anxiety, making no attempt to let go, start over, and fall in love with life.
“Let me be your lullaby, playing in your head this song every night.
Give me ten minutes, let me bare by soul…
I don’t wanna be alive if it doesn’t feel like this, right now…
I’m not afraid to die if you are by my side…”
Sometimes, despite distance, the intensity of our passion for another can be an emotion that eclipses all others. The sensations are familiar yet foreign, all senses heightened so that life before seemed black and white, and life with them, even for brief periods, is technicolour. Feeling like we’d die without that person, or that life would lose all real meaning without them, is so common, and often has a hurtful conclusion, and yet many of us willingly jump into the treacherous waters of love. Why is that?