Fear: Sarah McLachlan

“But I fear I have nothing to give. But I have so much to lose…”

It is so exhilaration, having someone say “I love you,” but such a declaration, while stirring feelings of comfort and joy, can also bring on anxiety and guilt. Because, if we’re honest, “Why?” is the question that so many of us think upon hearing those 3 loaded syllables. The fear that we are not enough: strong enough, worthy enough, good enough, pretty enough, to be loved can be crippling. But believing those words and behaving accordingly, like you mean everything to someone, can be liberating.

Fear: Part I- Loss

There are many moments in life during which we will experience loss. Like most things, loss can come in many disguises, like rejection, heartbreak, and death. Some things are lost with time. But fear of loss, and the inevitable pain that accompanies it, is one of the strongest emotions humanity possesses.

Oftentimes, we are so afraid at even the possibility of loss, of being hurt, that we try to avoid it by any means necessary, which is unusually a prolonging of the inevitable.

When we lose someone we love, it is a pain incomparable to any others, a wound so deep that, sometimes, it never fully heals. And anyone who’s suffered such a loss become exponentially more afraid of having to deal with that again. Thus, fear guides so many of their decisions and actions from that point onward.

It’s strange when you think about how so many of our the major decisions that shape and mold are lives are a by-product of this fear. So is it really the desire for happiness is shaping our existence? Or the fear of being hurt?